Starting with the basics again!
When you are deciding whether to have a relationship or not, it is important to have clarity about what you really want. Is it a boy/girlfriend, or a date, or marriage or a friend?
You will want to know the qualities that are important to you in a person that you want to attract.
You also must accept that it is women who do the choosing. Even though it looks like it is men, you all, clearly know that it is the women who do the choosing. A man who desires a certain woman, must get himself in a position to be noticed by her so that she can give him a signal that it is okay to make a move in her direction.
You can argue these ideas but eventually you will surrender to the reality that this is the way that it is.
So here are the first suggestions that I have for you if you want to have a significant,
loving, committed relationship in the future.
When you preparing to find a committed relationship, it is necessary for you to meet a lot of members of the opposite sex. Notice that I said meet, not date or sex. The purpose in doing this is to expand your perception of who the opposite sex is for you. Each of us has a unique idea based on our own personal experiences.
So meeting people outside of your comfort zone and being aware of certain traits and preferences will allow you to grow as a human being. It is very helpful to write down your observations about each of the individuals that you meet and here are three of the things you should be attempting to learn.
1. What is this person’s passion in life?
2. What is this person’s highest personal value?
3. How does this person treat and relate to and value the opposite sex?
If you are able to discern these things about a new person, you will be able to determine if you want to pursue knowing him or her on a deeper level.
Susan Sheppard is the founder of Getting What You Want, a life and relationship coaching organization created to reveal the power you have to get exactly what you want in every facet of your life.
Susan is a speaker, writer, and mentor who is committed to helping others create authentic relationships, that encompass chemistry, compatibility and respectful love.
I help men and women find and keep authentic intimacy in a hot relationship so they can have more fun, more sex and less bickering.